A Birthday, Depression, and a Prayer Request

This is a challenging post to write simply because I’m having a hard time expressing my thoughts. It’s been a challenging and a bit daunting of a week. I’ve actually not been terribly busy this week, which has given me extra time to think and process through some recent events.

Last week Roger celebrated another birthday. I am so very, very thankful for this man who is my husband and best friend. We didn’t have any big plans as Roger worked on his birthday, and it was on a Friday, which means hot lunch, chapel, piano playing, and all the other Friday events. We did have a small celebration with our family, but no cake. The kids were fine with skipping the cake as long as we had ice cream!

On Saturday, I attended the funeral of my dear friend who passed away recently. Roger was unable to attend as he was working, and I left the kids at home. The funeral was at a local church and very close to our house. I was thankful that I had friends that were also attending the funeral, so I had someone to sit with during the service. The church building was packed, and it was just another affirmation that she was so very loved. The service was a beautiful one to honor her life and her testimony for Jesus Christ. One thing I know is that when I die I want the people who come to the funeral to know that they can have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I also know that I want lots of music, and I’d definitely prefer no organ music. I mean, not that I will care, but still!

Sunday presented me with the opportunity to led our Childrens choir practice, led in handbell practice, teach Sunday school, play the piano for worship service, and teach Children’s church. I’m glad its not like that every week, but every once in a while, I surely don’t mind. God certainly knew that playing the piano would be like a balm to my weary soul. I chose to play “It is Well with my Soul” for the offeratory. As I reflected on the words while playing the song, I can truly say that yes, it is well with my soul. That’s not to say that I don’t struggle or fail in my walk with Christ, but I also know that He is not done working on me yet. The last verse states, “And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight. The clouds be rolled back as a scroll. The Lord shall descend, and the trump shall resound, even so, It is Well with my soul.” Oh, how I look forward to that day! I love to play that song declaring that the Lord will descend. What a promise!

Emma barely made it until Roger came home from work

On Sunday afternoon, the boys were invited to our Pastors house to play with their son. The boys always enjoy spending time with Austin, out in the woods, being wild, getting dirty, and just being boys. They came back to church a bit muddy, but oh so happy! Roger, Emma and I had lunch at McDonald’s before heading home, and we enjoyed some fellowship with some older folks from our church. The pastor and his family also stopped in to get hamburgers to feed all those boys. And yes, McDonald’s is about the only fast food place around here!

Also this week, we watched the movie, “Facing the Giants” with our family. If you haven’t seen it, I
highly recommend it. It’s such a great family movie with a powerful message about how God does the impossible. It was a good timely reminder that we serve the God of the impossible. As we look to wrapping up another school year, and we prepare for the next one, I am praying for my God to show
Himself strong to our little Christian school. I am specifically praying for 90 students to be enrolled in our school. Think this is impossible? Oh, yes, it is! It’s asking for above and beyond all that we could ask or hope, but that’s the amazing part- God can do it! We’ve already started praying as a family for this request. Could God choose to not answer our request? Oh, He surely could. However, how often do we as Christians sell God short because we simply do not ask?! I often think we don’t
see God work in miraculous ways because we simply do not ask. I think we often have to settle for  something other than God’s absolute best because we didn’t take the time, energy or effort to implore Him to answer our requests.


In addition to everything else, I’ve struggled with depression this week. There- I said it! It’s a big, ugly word that lots of people don’t seem to want to discuss, talk about or address. But the truth is, its a real thing! I’m not in the throws of despair or anything like that, but this week has been a struggle. I
find myself weary, short on patience, lacking grace with my children, lacking energy, and just a desire to do nothing, which is so not me! However, I know that God desires that I fellowship with Him, that I find my joy in Him, and allow Him to give me rest. It’s a daily battle sometimes. I don’t struggle with depression all the time, but every once in a while, it creeps upon me. I know its partially in part because I want spring weather to be here! I want to get outside and walk again and feel the sun rays. I’m a bit bogged down by trying to help four kids prepare for an academic fair. They are doing a great job, don’t get me wrong, but I often wish they could ask someone else how to spell something for the
four hundredth time! (We try to have the projects put away by the time Roger comes home.) I’m also adjusting to finding myself being more of a single parent than I would like sometimes as we are entering back into longer days for Roger. I’m not complaining as Roger has a wonderful boss and a great job. I need to adjust not Roger! I find myself being emotional, which has our poor children completely baffled! Emma tends to be a bit sympathetic, but the boys just tend to disappear! However, the truth of the matter is that God is still on the throne. He knows my name, He knows my heart, and He loves me. (I would certainly be appreciative of a few extra prayers also)

The snow is melting...slowly! The boys are anxious to get out on the roads and start collecting cans and bottles again. We are slowly building up our family vacation fund, and if we all work super hard at it this summer, we might succeed!

A great song that I’ve listened to often this week: https://youtu.be/jdDIjbiVkA4