Our family

Our family
Robertson Family

Saturday, July 18, 2020

Hard Days & Deep Emotions




One thing is for sure- 2020 is going to be a year to remember! To be honest, I’ve always been one to tell my children, “Enjoy where you are at. Enjoy the age you are now. Etc.” And now I’m the one that wants to hurry up and put 2020 in behind us! I know that God knows exactly where we are at, and He knows what we are feeling. I’m thankful that God created us with emotions so that we can experience joy, peace, love,etc. Experiencing deep sorrow and sadness and loss are not my favorite emotions, but those are needed emotions also. This has been a week of experiencing those latter mentioned emotions. 

On Thursday we attended the burial of Kevin, Roger’s boss, our friend, a mentor to our children, and to be honest this was the closest person that our children have known that has passed away. Kevin was like a grandparent to our children, and they have experienced such deep sadness and sorrow. As we stood at the grave on Thursday, among the last to leave the cemetery, I felt as though my heart was breaking as I listened to my children cry at the graveside. I don’t think I will ever, ever have that memory erased from my mind. 

The burial service was held at a cemetery right near the airport. Our boys were asked if they wanted to join the pall bearers, and they all said that they wanted to do that. The line guys at Roger’s work helped the boys feel included, and I was thankful for that. There were a few chairs at the graveside service, as most of us stood. When Terry came and took her seat, Emma went and sat on the grass right by Terry’s chair. Travis, Wyatt and Garett all sat down by Emma, while Chandler stood right by my elbow. I hadn’t planned on Emma sitting down right by Terry’s chair, but Emma and Terry seemed to need each other. As Terry held back tears as well as let them flow, Emma just scooted closer and closer to her chair. Emma, herself, did not cry at the funeral but Wyatt, Travis and Chandler were all so exhausted from the tears by the end of the service. As a parent, it is so hard to watch your children go through difficult things. I can’t fix this for them. Life will never be the same, and it’s just hard. We’ve been so blessed to have Kevin and Terry in our lives, and Kevin will be so, so missed. Even now, I can’t write this without soaking through a pile of tissues beside my bed. 

At the small luncheon following the funeral, we had the opportunity to sit at a table with one of Kevin’s old friends. Oh, it was so good to hear him tell funny stories to our kids about the adventures that he and Kevin had together. Laughter is good medicine. Chandler did tell me on the way home, that he really appreciated that he could wear a t shirt and shorts to the funeral! Kevin rarely wore a tie, and in honor of that, all the pilots and crew wore their company t shirts. Our boys also have company T-shirts, and they were happy to not have to dress up. Garett wouldn’t have minded, but Chandler seems to get a rash whenever he has to wear dress clothes! (Not really, but if it’s possible to be allergic to dress clothes, Chandler would have that allergy!) 

Please continue to keep Terry in your prayers. She is a dear friend, and a strong lady. We love her dearly. No one ever expects these things to happen. I know that I envisioned Kevin mentoring Garett in flying, encouraging Chandler’s entrepreneurship, coming to school programs, graduations, and life events. But  that is not the case. We are faced with grief and changes. I’m thankful that God knows our emotions, and that He loves us more than I can fathom. Even when I do not understand, I know that His love is greater than I can fathom.

We’ve had a few other distractions this week, and we’ve been thankful for friendships, laughter, and sunshine! My friend, Bethany watched our children on Thursday afternoon, and it was such an encouragement to our children to have the opportunity to play with some of their friends again. Our friend, Art and Damaris, called us to tell us that they're thinking and praying for us. It was just so encouraging to hear their voices. 

We also received school recommendations from our governor today. To say that I’m overwhelmed would be another understatement. Nothing seems to get any easier! Please continue to pray for school this fall, wisdom, discernment, and just some good news! 

There’s an old hymn that I have had constantly on my mind the last few days. Part of it states, “When the days are weary, the long nights dreary, I know my Savior cares. Oh yes, He cares.” So, so thankful that Jesus cares for us. 











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